The Newest Veteran Pony

September 22, 2015

I’m back!

For the past 12 weeks I’ve been busy bringing a new little person to life. It was more like “covered in spit-up and a less-than-desirable substance,” but you get the picture. While I was gone, roughly 10 ponies were hired — that’s quite a lot of new faces! I guess that makes me the newest Pony in the stable again?

In an attempt to avoid a second “welcome to Fast Horse” awkward circle – where new Ponies are subject to amusing questions from the entire agency, all while enjoying food and drink – here are a few things to get to know me.

1. I wish I could double dutch. That would be the coolest hidden talent to break out at parties. I mean, come on. I’m talking mic-drop action. Who knows — maybe I’ll break it out at next year’s #FHFarmParty.

2. I never put my seat back on an airplane. Even when it looked like I was smuggling three basketballs in my stomach. Never. You think hard about this the next time you find yourself reclining.

3. This is how I think I dance.

This is what I really look like on the d-floor. And if you’re wondering yes, yes I have done this dance move before. In public. NBD.

4. I cannot watch scary movies. In fact, I don’t even want to hear you talk about them. And ghosts. Only when I have left a place forever, never to return, will I talk about the possibility that ghosts lived there. I can now admit, without fear, that ghosts lived in my college house.

5. My hair is in a bun 97 percent of the time. One day I broke out the hairstyle and thought, “Oh, this is kinda cute,” and the rest is history. I have three types of bun styles – weekend, fancy and everyday. Super crazy, I know.

6. I laugh at my own jokes — sometimes before I’m even finished telling the joke. They are just too good not to laugh!

7. I am a private person, so this is like sharing my diary.