New Pony Awkward Confessions

August 10, 2015

Hi, fans/friends/mom. My name is Hannah, and I’m a brand-new Pony. A quick recap: I’m originally from Becker, Minn., population 3,000. I graduated a few years back from Northwestern University with a degree in journalism. I have a charming lisp. No one’s ever told me to my face it’s charming, but one can assume. And, I had a fantastic first week on the job. Casual yet creative outfits on point. Froyo bar on my first day. Wine and cheese on my second. Super-welcoming new co-workers.

But, I have a few confessions from my first week. Awkward confessions. I did weird things. Things that are far from suave. Things even my lisp couldn’t charm my way out of. I wanted to keep them secret. I really did. I want to make friends here. But after my first Peepshow idea was rerouted (see below), this story was all I had. My New Pony Awkward Confessions:

Hannah Miller's New Pony Awkward Confessions

at Fast Horse.

1. I got to work 45 minutes before I was supposed to walk in the door my first day. Better safe than sorry! However, the only parking spot left was right in front of Fast Horse. All my future co-workers would be walking by my car, and I didn’t want them to see me awkwardly sitting there, and I didn’t want them to see me aimlessly wandering around the unfamiliar neighborhood. What option did I have? Lay down in the back seat with a sweatshirt over my feet to appear as a pile of dirty clothes. No one was the wiser.

2. We use this Gchat-esque tool in the office to have quick convos and to set a status to let people know where we are working. We have four floors, so Ponies usually write “1” or “3” as their status or “hot” if they are working out of the office. For an entire day, I confused the status bar for the search bar that adds new contacts. Here’s an example of one of the many prime locations you could find me on day one:

Hannah Miller's New Pony Awkward Confessions

3. On my second day, I managed to kick my laptop bag very far underneath our giant work tables. I wasn’t going to get down on my hands and knees to crawl under the Pony-filled table. Thus, I trusted that my arms would morph into Stretch Armstrong arms. Nope. Instead of retrieving the bag, my neck just kind of got jabbed into the table edge for 15 seconds making me dizzy and sleepy at the same time. My big brothers have been trying to put me into the sleeper hold for two decades, and I basically did it to myself by accident. Suckers! I ended up aborting the mission to sit on the bathroom floor for five minutes to breathe and recover.

4. Last, but certainly not least, I asked my supervisor if I could write my first Peepshow post about a clothing-optional hot springs I visited last week — that I didn’t know was clothing-optional until I got there. My proposed title was “New Pony, New Nude: A Literal Peepshow.” She said I should probably rethink the topic. Great first impression, Hannah!

All right, then. Enough with the confessions. Here’s the deal. I’m okay with being a little weird and a little awkward at first. I know it all comes down to nervousness (and maybe/definitely a little DNA). As a former journalist, I’m brand-new to the agency world and therefore a little intimidated. But nervousness is okay. Nervousness breeds after hours of research on our clients and former projects to catch up to speed. Nervousness breeds spending the weekend reading up on the Twin Cities agency world. Nervousness breeds reaching out to senior Ponies for guidance and help. And nervousness breeds pretending you’re a pile of dirty clothes.

Here’s to week two. Less weird, less nerves, and less working on top of other Ponies. Hopefully.